Trials.. and vacation time

We found out yesterday that hubby's mom has small cell lung cancer.. she is in the hospital and started her radiation treatment today. He and I went up and saw her for a little bit this evening, she was wiped out. The drs say she should make a full recovery after the 7 weeks of radiation. But it makes for a trying time right now.

Hubby and I are supposed to head off to Texas on vacation this Saturday while all the kiddos head off to my folks house for the week. Now it will hinge on if his mom is doing ok. ( Or as ok can be expected).

I have a lot to do in the last few days...lots of cleaning, packing.. etc. Still have to find someone to take care of the animals while we are gone.

Slim fast...

ok.. this morning I decided that I have a mini- goal of lossing 10 lbs by July 21st. If I am able to do that I will be at 199 lbs!! And then I will go from there with my next mini goal!!

So I started my slim fast plan again.. and I decided to allow myself the full 1,500 calories intake a day that they recommend rather than the 1,300 calorie that was the lowest plan they offer. So now I feel like I have more flexibility in what I eat.

Today.. I did not cheat.. even though I wanted to.. and I only took in 1,470 calories!! So still less than what I was allowed. Ok.. I forgot I drank a pop.. so I added that in.. before I did I only had 1,270 calories. So pop really is empty fatting calories!! Bad me on that.

Kids Birthday Party

We had a fun combined party for all the kids on Sunday with over 40 kids in attendence. We played organized games: Sack race, gopher tunnel, Egg relay, egg toss, cubby bunny, shoe pile scramble, Guess my name. It was a lot of fun.. I played alot with the kids.

Here are some pictures:

Brenden's Ear Surgery

Pictures of Brendens surgery day for his ear.

New beginning

I have joined a friend in the makeover scene..lol.

I have started moving more.. my exersise is dancing, walking, maybe bike ridiing.

Also I have started following my pouch rules again and that has helped limit what I eat. No drinking while eating, only eating till I fill satisfied. I may eat more smaller meals.. but I feel better. Also drinking a lot more water. If I don't want water I add the Crystal Light on the go pouches to it.

Finally figured out this blogger stuff

Ok.. I am sooo slow. Today I finally figured out how to really edit here, and add links.. etc. Also found out a friend of mine had responded to a post, had a blog here.. and I didn't even know it. Big ol' Duh on my part.

At any rate.. I am happy I got this back working, and figured out that I can edit the things I want. LOL.

long time no blog..lol

Few new things that are happening: 1. Oldest daughter is turning 12 tomorrow.. and thus starts the rounds of kids birthdays for us!!! 2. My parents are comming down on friday and my house is a mess... so that means today we will be doing a flight of the bumblee bee to get it clean. 3. Yesterday I reconnected with my best friend all through school!!! It was awesome, and we exchanged phone numbers so we could keep in touch.

trying to get school done, but seems the more I do, the more there is still to do. LOL. we will get it done.

the cutest couple

Beautiful Sunrise

Ok.. missed two days again

Here are just a few silly shots of the kids.

Scrappy Chic

My scrappy chic site is down.. I am going through withdrawl!! I keep looking at everyones blogs to see if they have posted.

I have a cute picture of Brenden.. we went shopping last night and bought him some new pants and a shirt that were on sale.

Slim Fast.. 3 month

Here is my before picture: 229 lbs



And my 3 month photo: 212 lbs

New year

Well first.. I have decided to do a photo a day in January (thank you Amber). So since this is the 2nd.. I will post two!!


What is under the coats?


It's a sleeping Brenden!

We went to wal-mart yesterday and he was so tired he laid down and covered himself up with the coats and fell asleep. Was too cute to pass up! I am sooo glad I carry my camera with me now.


Other thoughts.. new year resolutions:

1. School - need to get back on routine with school.
2. De-clutter - remove stuff we don't use.. give away or sell on ebay
3. Cleaner house
4. Get back with Church - not only going.. but doing devotions everyday.

Ok.. not in order from most important.. but just as they came to mind.

ABC Tag

ABC Tag
A - Available or single: Married!
B - Best friend: James
C - Cake or pie: Marble cake
D - Drink of choice: Water
E - Essential item you use everyday: Computer
F - Favorite color: Peach, from light to dark
G - Gummy bears or worms: Bears.
H - Hometown: Was born in Wichita KS, but raised in Valley Falls, KS
I - Indulgence: Chocolate.
J - January or February: Toss up
K - Kids & names: Krystyna, Erin, Jason, Michael, Brenden, James (LOL)
L - Life is incomplete without? My family
M - Marriage date: 11-13-98
N - Number of siblings: 1 sister, 2 brothers
O - Oranges or apples: Apples,Galas
P - Phobias or fears: Spiders
Q - Fave quote: Smile it makes people wonder what your up to.
R - Reasons to smile: My family
S - Season: Fall and Spring. All of them
T - Tag 3 or 4 people: Whoever wants to!
U - Unknown fact about me: I can't think of anything
V- Vegetable you don't like: Spinach
W - Worst habit: Making sound examples when I talk.
X - Xrays:Too many
Y - Your fave food: Lagsagna
Z - Zodiac sign: Sagitarious

Celeberity look alikes

Another picture of James and I together.

Here's me:


Here's James:

Who do I look like?

Different photo:

Selfish

That is my name.. and I have been extremely selfish. I know it, and I am sorry for it. I need to step back an evaluate what is important in my life. Is it my family, or STUFF? Will the stuff make me happy? Or will my being alone make me happy?

At any rate, I need to not be so selfish, and put my family first. IN ALL AREAS!! $$,happiness, home, etc.

I feel as if I am drifting away.. like I see what I am doing, but sometimes I just can't stop it. I need to refocus... or else I am going to lose it ALL!!

Lord, Please help me to refocus my life on you and your will for me and my family. Let me come back to the place where you were/are first in my life. Let me have my joy back at being a mom, wife, daughter, friend. Let me come broken to your and let you put me back together. Let me find and keep friends that are more uplifting in you. Let me stop being so selfish. I love my husband and my children, let me be able to show it in all areas. Thank you. amen

Venting

This last week the kids were gone to my parents house so they could attend VBX ( vacation Bible school). James and I got along just great, no fighting.. just spending time together. However last night as we were comming home.. not sure if it was just cuz he was tired or what.. but he started being a real Arse. I stopped the van and told him he either needed to stop the rude comments or he could drive. So he hasn't talked to me since.

It just didn't make any sense for us to have such a great week and then to have him start acting like that.

anyway.. I pretty sure it's cuz all the work he has to do and he was extremely tired.

Personality test Challenge

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion: You have low extroversion. You are quiet and reserved in most social situations. A low key, laid back lifestyle is important to you. You tend to bond slowly, over time, with one or two people. Conscientiousness: You have medium conscientiousness. You're generally good at balancing work and play. When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done. But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it. Agreeableness: You have high agreeableness. You are easy to get along with, and you value harmony highly. Helpful and generous, you are willing to compromise with almost anyone. You give people the benefit of the doubt and don't mind giving someone a second chance. Neuroticism: You have high neuroticism. It's easy for you to feel shaken, worried, or depressed. You often worry, and your worries prevent you from living life fully. You tend to be emotionally reactive and moody. Your either flying very high or feeling very low. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is low. You're a pretty conservative person, and you favor what's socially acceptable. You think that change for novelty's sake is a very bad idea. While some may see this as boring, many see you as dependable and wise.

The Five Factor Personality Test

Secrets: challenge

Ok.. taking a deep breath.

- I was sexually abused by my birth mom's boyfriends, and so was my brother. one of them even made him & I have sex together.

- I had oral sex with my brother one time after I was adopted.. he talked me into it. I was 10 or 11..and we were camping in a tent in the front yard.

- I used to sleep walk

- I was sexually abused by my female babysitters when I was little, and I still have moments where I find women attractive.

- I am a bipolar depressive.. when I am down I want to die, and let my family be happy without me.

- I have told my husband to just divorce me, that I would come and take care of the children and homeschool them while he was at work.. but they would still live with him. ( So far.. he hasnt' done it..Praise God!!) he must be a glutton for punishment.

-I have fantasies about other men ( mostly famous)


ok.. I know there are more.. but if you have read this.. ummmm still love me?